My Dad Retires

There are really no words sufficient to describe the depth of the love I have for my dad, L. Michael McQuerrey, Mr. Mac, Papa Mac. And I know my love for him is shared by hundreds, maybe thousands, of people. He has been a rock in my life and the lives of many others. He has spent 35 years teaching, loving, mentoring, and ministering to teenagers through music. As I watched his final concert on Tuesday night, the emotions that welled up inside me were astonishing.

How does one really digest the last concert performed by one of Mac's high school choirs? Could it really be that this was the culmination of 35 years? How would life be without Christmas concerts, Spring festivals, choir tours, booster meetings, and how would the next generation of Kern County musicians fare without this man? It is a shame that anyone would live this life without being under the tutelage of Mac at some point.

And so the tears flowed. They flowed and flowed...in memory and celebration of Mac's career. I looked around at hundreds of teary faces while the Liberty kids sang Billy Joel's "Lullaby." "Goodnight my angel, now it's time to dream. And dream how wonderful your life will be. Someday, your child may cry, and if you sing this lullabye, then in your heart, there will always be a part of me...." dedicated formally to my babies, Mac's grand babies, but really, a dedication and promise to all those kids out there...some now in their 50's. Mac will never forget you or the time he spent with you...loving you, teaching you, singing with you, laughing with you, making fun of you.

And that is a part of Mac too...the making fun. He kids and jokes and can really call you out when you do something stupid. But he can do that, because he's Mac. Because he loves you. Because you know in your heart he would do anything for you and that his greatest joy and goal is to see you succeed. If he makes fun of the stupid part of you long enough, he knows you might just knock it off and get your "rear in gear!"

There are innumerable penguins, frogs, and other mementos decorating my dad's home office now--the penguins started when his Arvin High kids determined my tuxedo-clad father looked remarkably similar to one. The frogs? Well, the man likes frogs. I always liked the acronym "Full Reliance On God" (FROG) that reminds me of my dad's ability to commit his life to those loathsome (at times) teenagers only by the grace of a higher power. I wondered sometimes why such a strong, powerful man had so many stuffed animals in his office. I am beginning to understand that they remind him, I think, of the love he was able to extract from all those cool teenagers--so cool and yet so in love with Mac, that they purchased and presented fuzzy creatures to him as tokens of their devotion.

He didn't just teach his kids to be fabulous musicians. He taught values, compassion, etiquette, grammar, loyalty, commitment and poise. We are all better people for having sung under his direction. (or in my case, for having lived through it :)).

As with every concert for 35 years, this one ended with an invitation for all Mac's former choir members to join the choir on stage for, "The Lord Bless You and Keep You." There were so many people on stage, I thought it might fall down, and it was beautiful. I just listened from my seat in the audience, sitting next to my beloved husband, treasuring our three awesome blessings, crying more tears than I care to admit, and praising God...for all that my dad is and all he has been for others.

And I selfishly thought, "I can't wait to have this sweet retired man all to myself!!!"

I love you Papa Mac.

You Bought What on Craig's List?

So my sweet wonderful husband has taught me a lot about living a frugal lifestyle. One of our family theories is, "never pay full price for a new item when you can get it gently used for cheaper!"

With this theory in mind, my hubby often peruses the oft overlooked Craig's List ads for bargains. Sometimes we end up with things we shouldn't have--like the used and non-functioning water cooler in the corner of the kitchen. I am still holding out hope that one day the water from it will be colder than room temperature, but not much hope.

More recently, Scott called me after school and said he was going to look at a 14 ft. trampoline. "Really? Huh." was my only response. In my mind, all I could see was a giant trampoline somehow wedged beteen the rain barrels and the fence in our approximately 14 square feet of backyard. I just thought, surely this was nothing to worry about.

But then, the price was right, the family was so nice, the thing was practically brand new and they just bought a new one for their new house because they did not want to take the thing apart, and home came the 14ft. trampoline.

He got the thing up today and I think it might just be the most fun thing I have ever experienced. And I am certain once the safety pad and net are up, I will be able to breathe when the kids are on it as well...ONE AT A TIME!!!

Just goes to show, hubbies are really cool and moms sometimes worry too much. Happy Mother's Day!

Dress up anyone?

This week, we inherited what could be the most coveted little girl item in the world--an entire trunk of princess dress-up clothes. No room in the house is safe from the drizzling of jewels, garlands, dresses, shoes, crowns, gloves, or booties contained in its hallowed trunkiness. Thanks Kevin for the hand me downs...I think. Now my kids wear heels more than I do.

The Haner Family

Here are some recent photos of the crazy Haner kids. They sure do like to hang out together. I can't figure out if that's normal or not, being an only child myself. It is nice that they interract well and don't harm each other...very often. I sure love them a LOT. My love for them is more intense than I ever thought possible of my self-centered self. I pray every day that they grow up knowing that I love them passionately, intensely and with all of my being....even when I make mistakes, yell, and ignore them in favor of cleaning the house or sewing....or blogging. Lord, please remind me to pay attention to them and love them proactively.

Swine Flu and Vaccines~I Don't Mind a Little Controversy Now and Then

I worry, just like any mother, about illness affecting my children. That's why I do research and that's why I love this article (a reprint from Dr. Mercola's site, which is being bombarded with readers right now searching for answers to Swine Flu questions). As for me, I also believe that vaccines are dangerous; not all vaccines, and not necessarily to the point of complete avoidance, but I do believe there is danger there. That's why I do even more research. The answer, ultimately, lies in your gut. But Dr. Mercola brings to light some very important issues and questions in the context of the Swine Flu that I believe every mom should read.

This is a link to a reprint of Dr. Mercola's article because his own site cannot handle the influx of hits right now:

http://www.sott.net/articles/show/183141-Critical-Alert-The-Swine-Flu-Pandemic-Fact-or-Fiction-

Especially important in this article, I believe, are the ways noted to avoid the Swine Flu (at the bottom of the article, reprinted below). I hope this can help other mommies feel more at ease and equips us all to avoid not only Swine Flu, but illness in general in a healthy, more natural, non-pharmaceutical way.

Quoting Dr. Mercola:

"Optimize your vitamin D levels.
As I've previously reported, optimizing your vitamin D levels is one of the absolute best strategies for avoiding infections of ALL kinds, and vitamin D deficiency is likely the TRUE culprit behind the seasonality of the flu -- not the flu virus itself. This is probably the single most important and least expensive action you can take. I would STRONGLY urge you to have your vitamin D level monitored to confirm your levels are therapeutic at 50-70 ng.ml and done by a reliable vitamin D lab like Lab Corp. For those of you in the US we hope to launch a vitamin D testing service through Lab Corp that allows you to have your vitamin D levels checked inexpensively at your local blood drawing facility and relatively inexpensively. We hope to offer this service by June 2009. If you are coming down with flu like symptoms and have not been on vitamin D you can take doses of 50,000 units a day for three days to treat the acute infection. Some researchers like Dr. Cannell, believe the dose could even be as high as 1000 units per pound of body weight for three days.

Avoid Sugar and Processed Foods. Sugar decreases the function of your immune system almost immediately, and as you likely know, a strong immune system is key to fighting off viruses and other illness. Be aware that sugar is present in foods you may not suspect, like ketchup and fruit juice.

Get Enough Rest. Just like it becomes harder for you to get your daily tasks done if you're tired, if your body is overly fatigued it will be harder for it to fight the flu. Be sure to check out my article Guide to a Good Night's Sleep for some great tips to help you get quality rest.

Have Effective Tools to Address Stress. We all face some stress every day, but if stress becomes overwhelming then your body will be less able to fight off the flu and other illness. If you feel that stress is taking a toll on your health, consider using an energy psychology tool such as the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), which is remarkably effective in relieving stress associated with all kinds of events, from work to family to trauma. You can check out my free, 25-page EFT manual for some guidelines on how to perform EFT.

Exercise. When you exercise, you increase your circulation and your blood flow throughout your body. The components of your immune system are also better circulated, which means your immune system has a better chance of finding an illness before it spreads. You can review my exercise guidelines for some great tips on how to get started.

Take a good source of animal based omega-3 fats like Krill Oil. Increase your intake of healthy and essential fats like the omega-3 found in krill oil, which is crucial for maintaining health. It is also vitally important to avoid damaged omega-6 oils that are trans fats and in processed foods as it will seriously damage your immune response.

Wash Your Hands. Washing your hands will decrease your likelihood of spreading a virus to your nose, mouth or other people. Be sure you don't use antibacterial soap for this -- antibacterial soaps are completely unnecessary, and they cause far more harm than good. Instead, identify a simple chemical-free soap that you can switch your family to.

Eat Garlic Regularly. Garlic works like a broad-spectrum antibiotic against bacteria, virus, and protozoa in the body. And unlike with antibiotics, no resistance can be built up so it is an absolutely safe product to use. However, if you are allergic or don't enjoy garlic it would be best to avoid as it will likely cause more harm than good.

Avoid Hospitals and Vaccines.

In this particular case, I'd also recommend you stay away from hospitals unless you're having an emergency, as hospitals are prime breeding grounds for infections of all kinds, and could be one of the likeliest places you could be exposed to this new bug. Vaccines will not be available for six months at the minimum but when available they will be ineffective and can lead to crippling paralysis like Guillain-Barré Syndrome just as it did in the 70s."

Chickens Among Us

We got new baby chicks the week of Easter. We are not sure why, except that the chickens we have are so great. They provide us eggs, fertilizer, bug control (they can only eat so many earwigs, but they try to help out), garbage disposal (they eat anything) and a good laugh now and then. So, why not have more???

??????

We're still not sure about this decision. It's kind of like having more kids. The ones we have are great, so...bad reasoning...

Anyway, the new baby chicks are different types than our old ones. My favorite new chick is the light brahma, which has feathered FEET! Scott built them a great little enclosure in the garage complete with pine shavings, DE, and the perfect little roost. It's nice to see the little girlies whenever I travel to the garage fridge for my daily (one of my daily) Diet Pepsi(s). It is sad for the van that it had to be displaced for now, but if the van ate earwigs, maybe we'd reconsider.

Everybody's gotta love that last view of the rear...I mean chicken cage. :)

Bread Dough Recipe

Photo from www. deliciousdelicious.com










I use this recipe for everything: bread (duh), dinner rolls, pizza dough, you name it. I like it because there are no eggs, no butter, and no sugar, and it still tastes fantastic. I have honed it over the years I have been making my own bread and this is what always works for me.

I love knowing what is in my kids' sandwich bread, and knowing there are no preservatives or fillers. I know bread flour and whole wheat flour (not self-ground) are not inherently nutritious, but it's still a good healthy recipe when compared to most store bought breads I think. I occasionally add some flaxseed meal or bran to the recipe, but have to be careful with little tummies not to overdo the fiber additives. I also add dried cranberries or blueberries for a fun breakfast bread.




Ingredients:

3 c. bread flour
1/2 c. whole wheat flour
1 1/4 c. warm water (borderline HOT water, not just room temp.--like 105 degrees-ish)
1/8 c. honey (I just make five big circles in the bread dough pan)
1 package active dry yeast (I use Fleischman's--sometimes rapid rise if that's all I have)
1/4 c. olive oil
2 t. salt





Put all this in the pan of your bread maker and start it.





For dinner rolls: Use dough cycle (on mine, this is about 2 hours and 30 minutes.) When the dough is finished, split it into balls and bake at 350 for about 20-25 minutes or until the balls are hard on the outside and lightly golden brown. Makes 18. (2 pts. each for Weight Watchers.)



For pizza dough: Use the same instructions as for dinner rolls, but instead of making balls, roll dough flat onto a pizza stone, cover with pizza sauce, cheese and toppings and bake at 375 until crust is hard to the touch and toppings are melted--usually about 30-45 minutes depending on how thick your crust is.



For bread: Bake on basic bread cycle, XL loaf. Mine takes 4 hours total. Voila! Yummy homemade bread, no work! :)





I just put in this recipe this evening and I can't wait to wake up to the smell of baking bread in the night. Yummers.



I would love to hear how this recipe works for you. Post your comment here if you use it.

Where Have All The Plantings Gone?

I went out to water my new plants this morning and all but two were gone!!! On closer inspection, I found that the root balls and tiny little stubby stems remained just below the soil surface. I suspect pincher bug devastation came in the night. I have replanted and sprinkled diatomaceous earth around to kill the little suckers from the inside out in an environmentally friendly way. We have thousands of earwigs (pincher bugs) around the yard right now. It is really creeping me out. Things like that always seem come in plagues here. We have had plagues of frogs, black beetles, aphids, but the only recurring plague has been these darn earwigs. EVERY year!!! Yuck.

In the Garden Today

It felt good to get out in the garden today and plant some things. It has been unusually hot here for late April. Our thermometer got up to 96.1 in the shade. Yuck. But as the dusk approached, before I got dinner started, the whole family headed out back to do some gardening.

We picked up the boards covering our freshly turned raised bed soil to find hundreds of earwigs scurrying about. Yuck again. So we set one of our hens over there to scratch and peck for a while and clear the area. The chickens have proven not only to be good egg producers but also great pest control.

Soon after Miss Chicken did her work, I got in the bed with a rake and some Dr. Earth organic fertilizer and mixed up the soil a bit. Then I planted six cherry tomato plants from seedlings and two basil plants, also from seedlings. We started them indoors a few weeks ago and are hoping they will be able to stand this heat (which the news man assures us is going to subside in the coming days.) I found last year that having a little basil and rosemary near our garden attracted the bees and kept pests at bay. I'm not at all sure this is scientific, but it seems to work. Also, I love a nice tomato, mozzarella and basil side dish with dinner in the summer, drizzled with balsamic vinegar and olive oil. Mmmmm, caprese always reminds me of my much too short time in Italy...

Oh, my mind wandered for a moment, but must return to the reality of Bakersfield...less culture, more fast food.

I also planted peas along the back of the raised bed where Scott will build a permanent trellis this year. Our pea trellis last year could not stand the weight of the plants and began to buckle toward the end of the pea growing cycle. I am looking forward to planting cantaloupe, squash, and zucchini this weekend.

TOMATO TIPS & WARNINGS:

-The best time to water your plants is from sunrise to 10:00 AM or 6:00 PM to sunset. -The plant enjoys water too. Don't just water the soil around the plant.
-You can wash picked fruit immediately and eat it. (OR I have noticed that if you are not going to eat the fruit right away, wait to wash it until you are ready to eat; otherwise, the fruit doesn't seem to stay fresh as long.)
-Avoid watering your plants during the hottest part of the day (12:00 PM - 2:00 PM).
-Discard any unused fruit that begins to rot. The tomatoes will appear darker in color and become very squishy feeling when they are starting to go bad.

-When you start to see yellow flowers sprouting, you've done it. You should have tomatoes coming off those sprouts within a week.

Some Tips & Warnings and Image courtesy of http://www.ehow.com/how_4512245_grow-tomato-plants.html

Mom and the Kids

Life with three kids under the age of four is so interesting. It is totally different than I ever imagined. I get to use problem solving skills in every decision I make during the day.

Who ever thought those critical thinking classes in college would actually come in handy? It may seem like an exaggeration when I say EVERY decision requires problem solving, and I do have a penchant for exaggeration, but this much is true. From the time I get up, I have to decide how I will manage to shower, eat, shop, organize, teach, play, change diapers, etc...all while keeping the non-occupied kid(s) sleeping, occupied, safe, caged...it's like a never ending riddle.

If one child is sleeping and the other is in the kitchen cupboard, how will one mom watch the third child coloring in the living room such that he or she does not Sharpie the entire living room? (to Sharpie: infinitive English verb, used primarily by moms of toddlers, meaning to take permanent marker and draw all over walls, desks and upholstery.)

If one mom has three children and goes to the grocery store, two children can ride in the main part of the basket while the baby rests comfortably in the top portion in his carseat, but where do the groceries go?

If one mom with a backache takes three children for a walk and carries the baby in a sling contraption, one child falls and skins his or her knee and the third child refuses to walk any further, how does that mom get them all home? (Thank God for cell phones.)

You see how the day is filled with little games and puzzles. Endless fun really. I'm certainly being a little sarcastic, but I am never ever ever bored and never lonely. And those are really nice things not to be.

One mom, three kids, and one fantastic husband...it's a pretty good recipe so far. Thanks honey for finally getting a picture of me with all three kids. (Yes, I made them all matching outfits for Wyatt's construction-themed party.)

My Cousins and Me

I got this picture from my aunt Tara (my dad's older sister) today on Facebook. I'm the one with the puffy pink shoes naturally. In this picture are my cousins Carlos, Miguel (who now goes by Joseph), Kristen (sp?) and Katie. My vague recollection is that we were at my Grandpa Mac's house for some sort of holiday celebration. Good times.

Oh Happy Day

All I can really think about today is how blessed we are, which is a nice change from my usual thoughts about how much I want to go to sleep.

We have three children now. They are Kya, age three and a half, Wyatt, who just turned two, and Caden, five months. Each has his or her own special contribution to our family dynamic and I cannot imagine life without any of them. Although I am increasingly frustrated with the fact that kids get sick all the time, I am thankful that my kids have strong immune systems that fight off invaders. I am thankful they are running crazy around the house because that means they are healthy and "normal."

I am so thankful that my husband has a job that is fairly secure. A qualified high school math teacher is always in demand. There is very little chance that his job will be affected by this economic mess. Kids always need to know math, and schools are always short on people who want to teach it. Our finances are nothing exciting, but we are committed to our 15 year mortgage and having no credit card debt, something I bucked at first, but for which I am now so thankful. We will have no mortgage at the age of 45 and be able to fund our kids' education, weddings, etc. because of these "sacrifices" now.

I am incredibly thankful that my husband trusts me enough to homeschool our kids.

I am so happy our federal tax refund came in today.

I am also having so much fun with my business. How many people get to make pretty stuff for a living? I have a new account with one of the most fantastic fabric manufacturers and am enjoying the new friends I have met in the crafting community. There are so many incredible designers out there. They inspire me each and every day. I am especially thankful for other stay home moms who want to help each other succeed in their home businesses. That is a true blessing. We're all in this together after all...our kids are the future, and those of us who choose to stay home should band together and support each other. We don't have to do everything alone, contrary to what popular culture says!

And finally, I am excited about Wyatt's construction-themed birthday party tomorrow. This will be the first real party we have had for him. The middle child is always neglected. So this one is going to be a big bash! I can't wait. I'll post pictures tomorrow night!

I am thankful for talented friends who are going to make this party awesome! Raquel, the best cook ever, thank you for being willing to "cater." Tina, the most crafty paper creater ever, thank you for making such creative, gorgeous invitations! Stacey, my new party planning friend, thank you for your AMAZING party favors! They are fabulous!

We are going to have a scavenger hunt for "boulders" (tin foil balls), truck races on a tarp, and running relays around orange caution cones. I am hopeful that Kevin Charette is actually correct about the weather for once tomorrow because it's supposed to be beautiful!!!

Glory to God for all our blessings and for making our life totally bearable even when things aren't going this well. Thank you Lord!

Easter Upon Us

Scott said to me today, "I am really happy with our home, our family and our life." I coughed in response. I have been sick all week and most recently a lovely cough and earache have added themselves to my myriad of miserable symptoms. I can barely hear anything because of the ear infection. But, truly, what have I got to complain about? My life is LUSH compared to many, yet I find myself a little melancholy today, the day before Easter.

Easter comes as a celebration for Christians of a risen Lord, a time for joy and rebirth, a time to take stock and clean up before Spring is sprung and the heat of summer swelters. But here I am sitting at the computer feeling melancholy.

I finished some projects and took a bath, but still felt melancholy.

I tried to rest on the couch, but Caden called, so I fed him and he slept for a little while and daddy had the other kids in the garage...still melancholy.

Then it hit me. I have been looking forward to something for a long time. I have been looking forward to Spring Break...and it's almost over!!! And there are no more holidays for Scott for a loooong time. It's that feeling that the happiness is almost over that is tugging at my mind and heart. So, I better get out of this funk and go do something fun before our time is up!

No more moping. I think I'll go get some Easter basket goodies for the kids and help my hubby in the garage. Oh, and it sucks to be on a diet during Easter time. OK, Lord, I'm sorry for my pity party. Back to the grind, with a joyful heart and a better attitude!

Baby Caden

Baby Caden, four months old and almost 18 pounds, can scoot across the entire house now. He cannot be left alone anywhere. Why oh why do you have to be growing up so fast little man?

What our Kids Remember

What kinds of things do you remember your parents doing that made an impact on who you are today?

When you thought I wasn't looking...(author unknown)

When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator, and I immediately wanted to paint another one.
When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you feed a stray cat, and I learned that it was good to be kind to animals.
When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you make my favorite cake for me, and I learned that the little things can be the special things in life.
When you thought I wasn't looking I heard you say a prayer, and I knew that there is a God I could always talk to, and I learned to trust in Him.
When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you make ameal and take it to a friend who was sick, and I learned that we all have to help take care of each other.
When you thought I wasn't looking, I saw you give of your time and money to help people who had nothing, and I learned that those who have something should give to those who don't.
When you thought I wasn't looking I saw you take care of our house and everyone in it, and I learned we have to take care of what we are given.
When you thought I wasn't looking I saw how you handled your responsibilities, even when you didn't feel good, and I learned that I would have to be responsible when I grow up.
When you thought I wasn't looking I saw tears come from your eyes, and I learned that some times things hurt, but it's all right to cry.
When you thought I wasn't looking I saw that you cared, and I wanted to be everything that I could be.
When you thought I wasn't looking I learned most of life's lessons that I need to know to be a good and productive person when I grow up.
When you thought I wasn't looking I looked at you and wanted to say,' Thanks for all these things I saw when you thought I wasn't looking.'

Wyatt's Family Birthday

This is a picture of Wyatt practicing blowing out a candle before the real thing with big sis Kya supervising (she is in full blown teacher mode these days. :))

I have always heard of birthday traditions, but never really had any in my own life, so I decided my kids would have some. In particular, I thought each child could have a special food or dessert associated with their special day. So, for Wyatt this year, we had homemade cookies and milk (the milk was homemade only for Caden ;)). The cookies weren't very good, so next year perhaps a different recipe wouldn't spoil the tradition? I don't know, maybe Wyatt's birthday tradition will be crappy cookies and milk...

Anyway, my folks and Scott's came to Wyatt's little cookies and milk party and shared a special time in honor of Hanerman 2. Thanks little man for making us smile EVERY day and for being just about the cutest kid in the world (in this unbiased mom's opinion)! WE DO TRULY ADORE YOU WYATT SCOTT (even though we gave you crappy cookies and milk as your birthday tradition). Hey, you are an April Fool's baby after all. :)

Green Beans for Dinner

There is something about the competition, accountability, and challenge of The Biggest Loser group of which I am a part, that has changed me completely. I couldn't control my eating before this started. That is so cliche, but honestly, I am talking dozens of cookies in one sitting...and honestly, I had kind of given up. With three little kiddos, lots of responsibilities, and a husband whose love is unconditional, I just couldn't get motivated to lose the weight.

Then came the invitation to join The Biggest Loser competition with my former partner, Rachel. In ten weeks, I lost 22 pounds. And I find myself now on Sunday nights, the night before Monday morning weigh-ins, eating green beans and fat free cottage cheese and drinking lots of water. I cannot believe how my habits have changed. I actually say "no" to cake!!!! (Those of you who have known me for any significant time know this is just plain CRAZY talk!)

When I am tired or emotional, I don't eat chocolate or cheese anymore; I reach for a low sodium V8 or popcorn. My daily intake is so healthy that when I eat something super fatty or high in sugar, my body actually feels yucky. And mostly, I just don't want to pay anyone ten bucks (the penalty if you are the lowest on the totem pole for the week!)

So I sit here munching green beans, and kind of enjoying it as my pre-pregnancy pants are starting to fit again. Oh dear, what will I do when the competition is over?????

Midnight Squeals

Let me set the stage:

It's pitch black, the sleep machine is humming, and everyone is soundly sleeping. The dog is snoring at the foot of the bed, the cats are curled up in the living room, Kya and Wyatt are asleep in their bedroom. Scott and I are huddled up under our blankets dreaming happy dreams of a less sleep-deprived existence. Suddenly, a piercing sound disturbs the slumber. I kept the camera nearby last night to capture the excitement (you can't see anythng because he is doing this in his Pack 'N Play in the corner of our room and I'm not about to turn on the lights and play with him at 2 AM despite his insistence.) This is the fourth night in a row.

Oh Caden, we love your happiness!!! But will ya please go to sleep??

Off the Bottle and Living Healthy

I pick out books from the library in the following manner:

1. Quickly drive double stroller along the edge of the section of books that has non-kid stuff and pick up whatever I can get my hands on before my kids get antsy and/or start pulling books off the shelves;

2. Quickly take kids to kids' books section before they know mom was doing something at the library not related to entertaining them.

That's how I happened on this little gem. I love the things Mariel has to say about allowing imperfection in your life and enjoying the energy it can bring. I have lost my joy most of the past month or so because I haven't been breathing in the energy of my life. That sounds pretty vague and new-agey, but it's true. I find myself holding my breath or my heart pounding 90% of the day...this is in part uncontrollable since my kids' ages make them prone to death-defying, anger-inducing, destruction-causing activities. What mom wouldn't hold her breath to keep from swearing, screaming, crying, in my house?

But, as I read this unintentionally chosen book, I find myself smiling more and taking moments to enjoy life's pleasantness--just the very fact that I am here on this earth living and breathing with three rambunctious energy filled children and a handsome hunk of a husband is enough...surely all I need is enough, no more. I even tried my hand at a few yoga poses after reading yesterday--when, oh when, Lord, did I become SO UN flexible???! I could do the splits every which way when I was...eight. With some practice and encouragement from the kids, I even did a back bend this morning, I'm still not sure that was wise...but it was fun. (Ellipses anyone? I love them. If you don't, you will hate my blog----oh and hyphens---ever so much fun when you would like the reader to take a bigger pause than a comma can afford...sorry grammar teachers (mom).)

Now for the "off the bottle" part of this post...

Wyatt's new pediatrician eyed his Medela bottle full of cow's milk (not mine) at our last visit--it was, after all, his two year visit. How did Wyatt get to be two? I don't remember him going from one-and-a-half to two. In fact I have called him one-and-a-half even until last week...somehow I forgot that Wyatt was aging in these past hectic months with new baby, super drama three year old, new business demands, MOPS leadership role, etc. etc.

So, the doctor politely said, "When are we going to get him off those bottles?"

My reaction..."Huh? Really?" I almost became defensive, but rationality strangely overcame me in the moment and I agreed, rather surprisingly, "Yes, Wyatt should be off bottles." And I took him off bottles as soon as we got home. When he asked for a "big bottle," and I handed him a sippy cup, he looked at me in confusion. He placed the sippy cup back on the counter as though there had been some mistake.

I explained that the doctor did not want him to get rotten teeth and that it was time for him to be a big boy and drink out of a cup. "Otay," (OK) he replied, and took the sippy. It's strange how we build things up in our mommy minds. I was certain this change would be met with greater opposition.

And low and behold, my formerly NON eater is a ravenous monster, devouring all that is set before him. He isn't whining for his bottles like I thought he would be. He is happy, energetic, and older somehow. It's as though his body needed something other than milk to kick him into little boyhood. And with that bottle hanging out of his mouth all day long, he had too many milk calories, and no desire to eat. He ate a fresh green bean today! I couldn't believe it.

Thanks Dr. Ho!

Where in the World is Jake?

Ok, so Kya went back to preschool today after being out for almost a month. I rushed around the house getting the kids ready this morning, getting dishes done, fixing lunch for Kya and filling cups, snack bags and bottles. I finished the final stitches on a diaper bag I had to deliver, and as I finally buckled Wyatt into his carseat, Jake, our beloved Border Collie, jumped into the van with us. It is not uncommon for him to do this and it doesn't bother me to have him travel with us, so I didn't think much of it.

We drove to preschool, a lovely lady's house just a mile or so up the road and around a few corners. I opened one of the van sliding doors and unbuckled Kya, all the while trying to calm Wyatt, who was beside himself, whining about getting out and going with Kya (who he calls, "Deddy"--who knows why.) "Deeeeeedddddy!!!! OOOOOOuuuuut!!! Me!!! Me!!!!" All the while he was flailing and kicking his little legs.

As I unbuckled Kya, I vaguely remember scooting Jake out of the way to get her out, but only very vaguely. After all, Wyatt's special almost-two-year-old whining symphony was blaring in my ears. Caden slept peacefully through all this thank God!

Usually I walk Kya up the long walkway to the door, but today I just stood by the front of the van and watched as my little girl marched proudly to the door and thanked her preschool teacher for the kind get well cards before being ushered in. Thoughts of time passing and children and motherhood filled my mind as I backed out of the drive.

Off we drove to deliver the diaper bag. Wyatt now wanted to get out and go to this house too! "Oooouuuut!!!! Meeee!" Oh geez, here we go again. We went home after that and Wyatt fell asleep promptly, his symphony having apparently exhausted him as much as me. I sewed and cleaned, and talked on the phone. Rossie came by and we talked about sewing. Caden slept peacefully in his carseat for two hours. Fed Ex brought a package of radial arm saw replacement parts (don't ask.)

We picked Kya up from preschool and went home around 12:30. I moved a chair into the sunshine to nurse Caden in the backyard while Kya and Wyatt played. Then the doorbell rang. It was Fed Ex again. Something wasn't right--never mind the fact that we NEVER get Fed Ex deliveries, much less two in one day, but something was amiss--no barking. THERE WAS NO BARKING! Where was Jake? My mind raced. I thought back to the morning and when I had last seen my collarless, tagless dog (before you judge me, the jingle jangle of his tags and collar had annoyed us so much at night that we removed it years ago and since he never runs away, it never seemed necessary). And then my mind jumped to the conversation I overheard from the other moms at preschool pick up time about animal control picking up "that dog."

COULD IT BE?????

Tears burned in my eyes. My heart raced. Had I let Jake out of the van at preschool this morning without knowing? I called the preschool teacher, no answer. Called again...no answer. Eight times later, I got a call back from the teacher's daughter assuring me her mom would be home soon and return my call. Meanwhile, I called my hubby in tears screaming, "I lost Jake!!!!!! I lost him! I have to go look for him!" He reassured me, apparently sensing my guilt, fear, and complete irrationality.

"Get in the car kids! No, I don't care if you have shoes! GET IN THE CAR--our dog is lost!" Panic registered on their little faces and they hustled to their seats in a manner to which I am not accustomed. But I did not praise them sufficiently for their obedience because I was the dog loser!!!! and could think of nothing else.

Moments later, a call came to my cell phone as I drove through the neighborhood. It was the preschool teacher. Our dog had apparently jumped into another mommy's van and refused to get out. Without tags, there was no way to identify him so they had called animal control--he sat in there for almost an hour until animal control carted him off to jail. I was assured Jake was the picture of politeness (all but his refusal to leave the van). Jake just wanted to come home I explained.

"KYA, why didn't you tell the ladies that was our dog?!" I asked. "Well mommy, it looked like our dog, but I just thought Jake was at home." I guess that's fair.

OK, so off to animal control headquarters I went with three small children, two of whom had no shoes. Oh, and this was neat--I gave my driver's license to my husband this morning to copy at school so I could send in my seller's permit application--surely I wouldn't need it TODAY!

I arrived at animal control after the deadliest U-turn experience of my life outside the surprisingly busy Bakersfield Adult School. "What's my plan?" I asked myself. I will carry Wyatt, Kya can wear her too small boots from the giveaway bag and I will carry my wallet and keys, and I will carry Caden in his seat with my other arm. Surely the people will see my plight, my mascara stained cheeks, and take pity on me. I entered through the door marked "pull" (I only note this because pulling open a door with a load of children is hard work--if you EVER see a mom in this predicament, give her a hand will ya????.)

Anyway, the lady asked me if she could help us. I sobbed in reply, "We're looking for our dog." She said nonchalantly, "Go walk through the FOUR buildings of dogs and see if you can find him...." "Uhh, I have a four month old, a one year old with no shoes...and..." She apologizes (sort of) but tells me she has no records of what dogs are out there. So, carrying my entire family minus the dog, is the only option. We trudge through the aisles of dogs. Pit bull, pit bull, mutt, pit bull mix, pit bull....small runty dogs,...JAKE! Wait, is that you Jake?

He was wet, and dirty and totally bewildered by the small frantic mutts and piles of poo at his feet. But, yes, I finally determined it was him! Glory!!!!!

Back to the office I went with children in tow. "We found him!" I declared to all who cared (or didn't care) to know. The office lady asked me for my paperwork. Paperwork? Apparently Jake had some sort of paperwork on his doggy jail cell that I neglected to acquire. Back out to the doggy jail buildings we ALL went. Jake was now barking loudly in frustration--"Just take me with you please!!!" he seemed to plead.

We paid our fines, but the office lady needed a picture I.D. After more panic, more excuses, more tears, the lady accepted my Costco card with the black and white picture of me nine months pregnant and a verbal recitation of my Driver's License number. Thank you animal control lady!!!!

While I wait, the man at the front who has brought in a stray cat says, "While I have been waiting, the cat gnawed her way out of the box and ran away. So, never mind." AND HE LEAVES! Seriously?

Now I'm worried this is gonna take a while. The lady radios to somebody that the border collie in "A as in apple" ten should be released and brought to the front. Minutes pass...she tells me to go ahead and go to the van and wait. (By this time, Wyatt has attempted to destroy the credit card machine, written on her counter, and is sprawled on his tummy (no shoes and spaghetti sauce all over his hair and shirt) doing some sort of lizard slither on her counter (I couldn't put him on the gross doggy floor with no shoes!!!). Caden was squawking his displeasure at continuous confinement, and Kya was singing her own version of Beyonce's, "Put a ring on it." "We are usually so much more....together!" I wanted to scream. But no one really seemed to care about any of the madness. Just another day at animal control headquarters I guess.

Out to the van we went...After about three minutes, out came Jake, who jumped into the van without so much as a nod to me, the dog loser. He curled up at the kids' feet looking annoyed, but glad to be back with his crazy family again; and though he smelled like feet and sewer, he was ours, and we hugged him. I'm glad car wash day is tomorrow.

The kids were promptly dumped into the tub upon arrival home and Jake's new $76 hardware is now securely attached to his jingle jangly collar.

We missed you Jake! (once we realized you were missing.) Welcome home!